Empty Space

Generosity with the in-between…

“This is the time to be slow,
Lie low to the wall
Until the bitter weather passes.

Try, as best you can, not to let
The wire brush of doubt
Scrape from your heart
All sense of yourself
And your hesitant light.

If you remain generous,
Time will come good;
And you will find your feet
Again on fresh pastures of promise,
Where the air will be kind
And blushed with beginning.”

―John O’Donohue, To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings

As the holidays and the end of year approaches… I have been thinking about spaciousness. How to invite in more time, more energy, more resources to actually be present for all of the expectations that arise for me during this time. I want to hold a place for “empty space” at the table, so I may be sane and intentionally connect with those I cherish. So I may steer towards time well spent in ways that serve me best even if it doesn’t happen the way I expect.

What is your relationship to empty space? What impulses arise when you see it?

When there is a pause in a conversation, do you have a desire to fill it? Do you allow some silence so those who need a little time to contribute vocally have room to participate?

If there is blank space on a canvas, are you protective of keeping it void?

On an open stage, do you cling to the sides? Or do you take Center?

In a relationship, can you leave the dishes in the sink long enough for your partner to wash them because it is “their turn”, or do you need to have it done in the timeline set in your head? Can you wait for them to respond to your last text before sending the next, or is the space between messages a place where you imagination takes root to imagine the worst?

Whether it is in space or time, in relationship or in composition. Empty spaces are either attractive or terrifying.

….. In the Voice….. Pause….. the not knowing… silent scorn.

….. In Art…. Intentional Composition….possibility…. a lack of inspiration.

….. In Nature…. Preservation/expanse…. New plantings…..barren fields.

…. In Relationship… Allowance… longing… the growing apart.

Without the space between, without the pause or the longing, without the emptiness, the impact of when connection happens or abundance abounds, the sweetness of reconnection or receiving can get lost in the hustle and bustle of all the things flowing everything everywhere all at once. Just as we explored in duration + tempo, if music had no rests…. If the notes were constant and no variation? Is that even music, or is it just noise?

If you have never been on a dance floor, a bustling sidewalk with too many pedestrians, a concert where it is standing room only and you want to get up front to the stage. The only way through is to look for the open spaces and navigate the in-between.

Finding the path of least resistance in the spaces in between show me the way forward. It may not be a straight line, but I get there.

I can navigate my emotions and my circumstances in a similar way. If I have some generosity or peace to see the path in front of me.

I may not be able to stop my anxiety, but is there a space in my thoughts that are not filled with what is bringing me anxiety? Or is there a space/place in my environment I can go to get a little peace, a little breathing room, a nap? Can I create space by reaching out to another human to listen to their story so I am out of my own, just for a moment?

Or if an outcome is not shaping up in my favor, can I set down urgency and pause to give a little space for new perspective or new pathways to open up? Permission to allow space for what is. I don’t have to forsake my goals or desires because a specific trajectory or outcome is not open to me in this moment. I may just make it there on the scenic route, or perhaps even end up somewhere that is a far better place for me to land that I couldn’t see

Until soon….
See you at the next threshold,
Kirstin